On Monday, the day started peacefully with the snow making another appearance.
So close to when we get married is pretty much one of the worst times to be losing my job, and I have gone through every emotion possible since Monday, from being motivated by the change, to terrified of hating a new job or not being able to find one at all, to really upset at the fact I won't be doing my old job, with my old colleagues any more.
I'm still uncertain on what to do when I finish work in two months, and whether to have a 3 month break to concentrate on studying (and maybe learning to drive!) and planning our wedding, or whether to find a job now and hope new employers understand I need three weeks off soon!
Despite that rather rubbish news, so much has happened this month to show me that I am extremely lucky in other areas of my life, especially regarding the people in it.
I spent Tuesday with my parents on a lovely drive to have my wedding dress fitting. They hadn't seen me in the dress before, and luckily both loved it. It was special for them to see it on that day as it was also their wedding anniversary! After the fitting we went for lunch together - I don't see my parents often enough and it was really nice to spend time with them.
L and I also attended my cousins daughters christening recently. We are both not exactly the biggest advocates of christianity, but we still actually had a nice day chatting to my family and the other guests, and having food and drinks with everyone.
|L, me, and my mum|
Planning a wedding definitely shows your family and friends in different lights, and really highlights who will make an effort for you and who won't!
My friends have also been wonderful, and we have been lucky to have been able to spend time with all of our best friends already this year.
My friend Adam and I drove to Nottingham earlier this month and had drinks at a gothic style bar - we had lots of cocktails and lots of conversation!
This morning I had a lovely surprise in the form of a parcel I had to collect from the post office. The walk there in the sunshine was lovely, and I was really touched to find the parcel was beautiful flowers, chocolates and a note from two of my friends. I was smiley all day!
And of course, most of all, I'm grateful for how wonderful my fiancee is. When we found out about my job she has offered me nothing but reassurance, comfort, and love. We have been through lots of good things and bad things happening over the eight years we've been together, and the thing that makes me feel so safe is the constant presence of her unconditional love and support.
We are as usual not getting to spend much time together due to working as much overtime as we can - its awful coming home from work to an empty house, waking up alone, and going to bed alone, but we managed an at-home date night last week!
We found out via Twitter about a completely vegetarian pizza takeaway in Birmingham so had to give it a try! The food all looked so good but we settled on garlic bread, chips, sweet potato fries, a BBQ 'cheating chicken' pizza, and a 'cheating meatfeast' pizza. It was so yummy, we are already planning what we'll have when we return!
I'm also lucky to be getting married in four and a half months - the time seems to be flying by!
We have now given out all of our day invitations - we told people to RSVP any way they chose so most chose to in person or by phone, but we did get a few that sent us actual Acceptance cards, which we weren't expecting. Very sweet, and will be lovely to keep after the big day.
We now need to finish making the evening invitations, and send them out, aswell as other DIY projects like confetti, order of the days and a table plan.
We both now have our dresses, L has hers at home but it may need altering a little, and mine is on order, I won't get the final altered dress until the end of May, which I'm impatient for!
We will also hopefully have a menu tasting in March, then we have L's birthday in April, and our hen party for a close few of our bridal party in May. After that, it will only be 8 weeks to go until the big day, so we have lots to look forward to!
Valentines Day kind of passed us by unnoticed this year, with the news about my job it felt wrong to spend money on cards and gifts, plus we didn't see each other for it as I worked all day and L worked all night.
It isn't really a holiday we've ever made a big deal of, often finding a bit commercialised - we actually both looked at cards a couple of weeks ago and struggled to find ones that we liked.
However I have found myself inadvertently feeling the spirit of Valentines Day today, particularly the American form (those guys know how to do holidays!) of showing family and friends that you care - this week has shown me how much appreciation I have for the people I love - maybe next year we will celebrate it properly!